New dad and freaking out!

roland_7707

My wife and I reciently found out that we are preganant. Which is very cool. but im still freaking out. i was wondering if any of the other dads on here had that same reaction and how they delt with it. also and advice or nifty tips would also be appreciated. thanks.

kaspera79

... Children teach you as much as you teach them. They teach you about values, priorities, selflessness, and an entirely different level of love. You will know what I am talking about the second you hold that baby for the first time, and they look into your eyes. Enjoy every second, it will be the greatest years of your life.

cabinetmaker

Patience, they teach the need for patience. Especially when they are 3&4 ...

Smokin' Jim

My wife and I planned our daughter (she wasn't a surprise), but I did freak out. I was worried that I wasn't going to be as good of a dad as I needed to be. I didn't know if I could deal with all the things that a baby was going to require. Then she was born. I cut the umbilical cord, gave the first bath, put on the first diaper....all while my wife was resting. My daughter screamed the minute she was born and they laid her in an incubator next to my chair, I spoke to her, and she immediately stopped crying. They know your voice and can hear you in the womb. I'm not telling you to put your face up next to your wife's stomach and goo goo gaa gaa, but just talk at normal room level and the baby can hear you. Now my daughter is three and the COMPLETE CENTER OF MY LIFE! You are going to experience fear like you have never felt before, BUT, you are also going to experience a love so strong that just looking at your baby will bring tears to your eyes. So, choke down the fear and let your child change your life. You will not regret it.

Krieg

For a long time I kept telling my wife to hold off on kids, 2 years ago we had our first, and we waited for about 8 years for him. Then back in june, we had our 2nd. The only thing I regret is that I waited too long. We all have the same feelings about having kids sooner or later, so I can understand how you feel...after all, they don't come with an instruction book. But becoming a father was probably the happiest moment in my life.

if you think you're freaking out now, just wait till your wife goes into labor but don't worry, everything will work out. If I could pick out the one thing that being a father has taught me, is to not worry about the little things anymore. You are gonna love being a dad.

jship079

yes fear is the most common emotion for all men when the find out that they are taking on the responsibility of another life. If a man tells you he was not scared he is not telling the truth. Trust me my son turned two today and my second will be born on tuesday. I think I am more scared this time around than my first. I would say enjoy it.It goes way to fast. All of the good things far ought way the bad when it comes to being a father. The way I delt with it was freak out then say well there is nothing going to change this and I need to deal with it and be there for my wife. Oh and your wife will drive you flippin nuts by the end of the preganantcie its the hormons dont take it personal.

Vulchor

I will take somwhat the flip side here...and I hope it doesnt make it seem I dont love being a father(as I do more than anything)....but life as you know it will be over. THAT IS NOT, a bad thing most of the time (although there will be some nights out or Poker games you will wish you could go to). Date nights with the wife, going out with the boys, me time watching football, sleeping in on Saturdays----all will be much fewer and far between. That is all the bad news.

The good news is, that is all worth it and not really bad at all....just different and once you adjust (which doesnt take long) all the fear or nerves will be gone. There is no manual, you learn as you go...and Im sure you will do just fine. Enjoy the 9 months now too BTW....they are not as bad as sitcoms try to make them to be, and were a really fun time for my wife and I.

roland_7707

thanks for all of the help. I enjoyed reading your responses. yall sound like a group of great dads.

Russ55

Congratulations man. That's great. I didn't really freak out, but I was pretty nervous. It's intimidating as hell. I guess the way I dealt with it was to take it as serious as I could, and do the things I could to help from as early on as possible. Enjoy the pregnancy time. Take lots of pictures. Read the books, but don't obsess over them. None of them will give you the "right" answer, or even the same answer. They're all going to have trade offs. Decide what works best between your wife and you. Be ready for change, and for everything to have more meaning. Holidays just got 10 times more fun. It's awesome.

roland_7707

We went to the doctor yesterday and the expected due date is April 5th. And I went from freaking out to thinking that it is really cool. I appreciate all of the advice from yall. thanks

TatuajeVI

We planned our daughter (she's almost 4 months old now) and I still was really nervous when my wife told me she was pregnant. The strange bit is that two months after Maddie was born, we had a couple weeks there where my wife was feeling like she was pregnant again. Both of us were talking about it and truly were thinking it wouldn't be that big of a deal - even though we would have had two babies under 12 months old, lol. I guess you kind of get over that fear when you need to. (we found out a little later she wasn't pregnant again!)

It is a crazy thing, and a miracle at that, and no advice or books or preparation can prepare you for everything ahead of you in the next 9 months and beyond. That said, you will do just fine!

Here's a recent pic of her being the happiest baby ever:

roland_7707

thats cool man. thanks. she's cute.

mavmech13

I'm right there with ya bro. Although I'm for the most part past the 'freaking out' stage, we are due November 14th. This is my first also, so hopefully I won't screw him up too much lol. Are you going to find out the sex of the baby?

Oh and to the guy that said you don't have to talk into the belly, I literally talk right into her belly button. My old lady hates it, I think it's funny as hell LOL. Yes I have issues lol

roland_7707

yeah. we are going to find out. we have a little bet going. I think that it will be a girl and she thinks a boy. if she wins, she gits 3 months of massages (spelling) and if I win i get a new pocketknife. kinda lopsided, but I need a new knife. I will definiatly be talking into her belly, i already do and she is only 7 weeks.

mavmech13

We are having a boy, I'm very happy to be having a boy first. If I had a girl first I would have to buy a shotgun before she reached her teens lol. Hey if you need a new knife you need a new knife. We actually went to the movies last week and he wouldn't stop kicking! He loved it

lilwing88

Congrats, bro! Nothing to freak out about....... at least not now! Your kids (and you will have more) will spend all their time finding little ways here and there to freak you out plenty for the next 18-25 years. The pregnancy and birth are the easy parts (at least for us guys). I have two kids, 4 and 2, and the most exciting thing for me so far, is the realization that I never have to change a diaper again. Four years is a looooooong time to be changing dirty diapers! I can't even imagine some guys who have four or more kids. That's like eight to ten years of changing diapers!! Insane!!!!

Krieg

Both my sons were premature, but you wouldn't know it now. My newest was born back in June, he was 5lbs 7oz and is now over 10lbs. Most things never go according to plan, so just take it as it comes and make sure you have a good place have your baby! No way in hell I would ever have a baby at Cartersville Medical.

roland_7707

Yeah, our local hospital here sucks. but the ob/gyn that we have been going to is cool and we have not heard anything bad about him. we have been asking around and some people that we go to church with has used him with very good results. I just don't want to drive 2 hours to the next biggest town while she is in labor.

These Filthy Hands

Hey man, if shes in labor that just gives you a license to speed. Cut that drive down to less than an hour. I would.

Lasabar

Congrats.... Smoking age is 18.... That is all you need to know