Some Make it Worse for Others
RCY Cigars
Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 5,346
I see a lot has changed since I got here. I like to think some of the change was good. But let some of you say it, It's not. I also like to think that I was part of a new wave of fun that was good. I went against the grain. Bombing people after getting to know them with dogrockets, HTF, expensive quality cigars. It didn't matter, it was all for the fun for me. But also, giving some of the guys a chance to smoke something they probably wouldn't get for whatever reason. But they still would want to try it. I've been burned in the forum twice. Yet, I still pressed on by being a giving person. I wasn't trying to become everyone's friend. I just wanted to be that person to shine a little light when your having a rough day or come across a rough patch of time. It's a few other guys in here that think the same way as I and we talk about. It's basically something that makes us feel good. For some, it's like giving back. I don't think anyone can take that away from a person. As of right now, I know I won't hit my 3000 mark anytime soon. Why, all this bickering back and forth. People challenging others in the forum. If you notice, I rarely get into a pissing match with anyone. Yet, people throw little comments around all the time. Most of the time I laugh, really I do and ignore them. But even with saying that, enough is enough for me. When I first introduced myself, some of you welcomed me right on in as if we were family from the beginning. And that right there was what catapulted my decision to do some of the things that I have done. I'm not saying I'm leaving this place that got me started. But I am going to take a back seat to all the hoopra that's going on. This is my little frustration, you can take it for what it's worth. I know some will have there little comments because they always do. Just the same, I will laugh and ignore it. It's been fun for the most part. I will keep in touch with the guys and gals that's not into all the mess. Gaberox I still owe you and that's because I told you I would.....
Comments
As you stated, all the personal comments that poured in after the fact is what caused this to continue.
Having something to add to a discussion is one thing. The tendancy is sometimes to "pile on" when an incidence like this takes place. We are all responsible for what we say as well as what we do around these forums.
Rick, I respect your position on this as well as many things you have said around here. My concern is, that if the BOTL like yourself take a back seat and keep their thoughts to themselves, then the forum as a whole suffers. If the only voices to be heard around here will be the loudest, or most controversial, then I think we will eventually all lose this place. It is because of the voice of reason, which comes from many different sources on here that this place is for the most part a great place to hang. If we allow those voices to disappear... then this place really will become like so many other places out there that we don't spend any time at.
Perhaps we all need to read what we are about to post before hitting that post button. I am not trying to stiffle anyone's free speech, but if you are free to say what you like, to an empty room (forum) what difference does it make?
So anyway, I hope you stick around, because I really feel you've been a positive influence on the forums.
I've said it before and I'll say it again. The Forums are a better place with you in them, Rick.
I agree 100%. We all should act as you.
I think a forum tends to exaggerate feelings that might not be truly intended, and face to face, ANY one of us would together, sit down, and enjoy cigars together. It wouldn't be based on whether we are short or tall, thin or fat, rich or poor, or ethnic background, color of our skin, political preference, countries we live in, etc. The type of cigar wouldn't matter, cheap, expensive, infused, hand rolled, machine made...who cares? How long we have been enjoying them...again, does it matter? Months, or decades, sitting face to face, all differences aside we would BE brothers/sisters of the leaf, with smiles on our faces and pats on backs. Forums can lead to arguments that shouldn't be there, and wouldn't be eye to eye.
I know what you are talking about since we talk. And you know I feel the same way. That is why I don't really post much anymore here. Not saying I am perfect and I have had my own moments of bad judgement when posting. Just a lot of other things that start to grind on you even though you don't let it get to you personally you still just get fed up and decided enough. I hope no one feels like in is any one person or specific thing.
One thing that bothers me is guys judging each other by who has the best giveaways, who bombs the most, who trades away all their good sticks. For some reason if you aren't an insane bomber around these parts certain guys look down on you and make snide remarks and smart a$$ comments. And a true BOTL gives of himself without seeking recognition or praise anyways. But the attitude of some people towards others because you don't participate that much in that stuff is ridiculous.
Not that I ever need to explain myself or defend myself to anyone but I have done tons of things for the troops and other brothers without boasting about it and saying hey look at me. I have bombed guys and not even received a thanks let alone a mention on the good guy list or a thread with a pic. Not the reason why I sent anything but at least say thank you. I think it is awesome of the guys who give and bomb and do all the fun stuff and have time and money for that. But that isn't what being a BOTL is all about.
I will be seeing you around brother
Greg, I couldn't have said it better and am thankful for your perspective. Man I hope this place doesn't lose it's ambiance.
Way back when I joined this great little community , it was just that , a great LITTLE community , less than 3000 members I think if my memory serves me, at that time . One of the main things back then members took a high degree of pride in was policeing(sp) the forum and themselves and the few wrinkles we had were quickly ironed out and handled as gentlemen to everyones satisfaction . Now there are 14,000 plus members . There is no way you can cram 14,000 people from as varied backgrounds as we all have and there not be a couple of jokers in there with a attitude . Thats just life in general , whether your talking about 14,000 people in this forum , in a football stadium , working for a corporation , it does not matter .
We all occasionally let our foot slip off the common sense pedal and this engages our mouths before we think and we hit the post button .
No one's perfect . You'll notice I very rarily post in any political threads anymore . The reason is I made some comments once several yrs ago now that ticked off another old-timer on here . We had some small banter between us and that was that . A very well respected member of the community , still very much active . You know what made me mad ? That he was upset with me ? Absolutely not , that wasn't his fault , it was mine ! What really upset me was ME !!! Another guy now had an opinion about me that was totally not me ... not me in the least or what I am about . That bothered me . Does he still feel that way ? Maybe , I'm not sure . The point is the comments I made were silly , uncalled for and dis-respectful , for no other reason than my foot slipped off the common sense pedal . I have let him know I take responsibility for my words and posts and expressed my regret .I hope he has forgot about it .
The deal is if you mess up , man up . Take responsibility to handle it with courtesy , honesty , integrity , and from the heart . Take the extra step and also look inside yourself , is what your all fired up and mule-lipped ( and old country sayin' ) about really worth it ??? If you can't police yourself then nobody on here is really going to be able to either , but I'm tellin' you , its your loss .
I believe 99% of the brothers and sisters on here are good peeps , would help you out with anything they could in a skinny minute and ask nothing in return . 99 % ... Thats close enough to perfect for me , I will ignore the other 1% if they choose to continue like BORKS behaving badly .
RCY we have had zero deals with one another but I hope you reconsider and stay with the community ... if you choose not to that is our loss . You will be missed .
This post is not directed at any one person but just my thoughts on the forum as a whole . GENE
Guys and Gals,
It is only a cigar, don't idolize it or put it on a pedestal, it is only a cigar. A cigar called a Fuente, DPG, Diamond Crown, Davidoff, Liga Privada etc., by any other name, is still just a cigar