Things to do to amuse yourself while the wife shops ....Pick up about 3 boxes of condoms and ask the clerk where the fitting room is and what their return policy is ....
Things to do to amuse yourself while the wife shops ....Pick up about 3 boxes of condoms and ask the clerk where the fitting room is and what their return policy is ....
While wandering around at a Target Store I found myself in the comdom department. Who came up with the idea of Flavored Condoms..Or Glow in the Dark Condoms..Or for the guy that's really full of himself Magnum XXL size. So many choices these days !!
Couple more....The next time your at a restaurant ask for diet water with a straight face ......The next time you kids are being a pain, announce over supper that due to economic conditions your going to have to let one of them go ....
1.) A pirate walks into a bar with a ships steering wheel stuffed in his pants. The bartender asks "Whats with the wheel" The pirate replies "YARRRRR It's driving me nuts!!!!....and then gmill ordered tortuga rum
2.) Fun things to do: Rip massive ass in an elevator(last time i did this i laughed so hard i couldnt breathe)
3.) At a drive thru, after you place your order cover the speaker with duct tape.
4.) Place a HUGE order then slip out of line, laugh as the guy in the car behind you gets 40 bags of food(this is popular with drunk sailors on base)
Two lady golfers on the course. First one rips her first swing and watches in horror as the ball flys straight as an arrow into 4 men standing near their golf cart. One of the guys screams and with both hands clasped at his groin falls to the ground in a fetal position. When the ladies get there he's rolling and moaning on the ground in obvious acute pain with hands still over his groin. The second lady says I'm a trained message therapist and I can help you if you'll let me. No,no the man says, I'll be ok. No really the lady says I can help. She very gently removes his hands from his groin, unzips his pants and slides her hand down his pants. She then begins a gentle message and rub. After a couple of minutes and noticing his "putter" springing to life she says "now doesn't that feel a lot better?" Oh he-ll yeah that feels great but I still think your friend broke my damn thumb !!!
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2.) Fun things to do: Rip massive ass in an elevator(last time i did this i laughed so hard i couldnt breathe)
3.) At a drive thru, after you place your order cover the speaker with duct tape.
4.) Place a HUGE order then slip out of line, laugh as the guy in the car behind you gets 40 bags of food(this is popular with drunk sailors on base)