Ugh, JD, sorry to hear this. My sister and her husband go through some of the same stuff with her step-daughter's biological mother. Unfortunately, in what I believe is meant to be the best for the kids, the system is skewed towards keeping the kids with their mother Best of luck to you, someday we will get it right and the system will do what is best for the kid on an individual basis. Luckily for my sister, the bio mother's lawyer conceded that he didn't have a case against why they should have custody and had them draft up a custody agreement where they have full custody and the mother has supervised visits over the summer and holidays. She rarely follows the rules and has not paid one dime of child support in 8 years, but the judge will not take away the visitation. The mother does not call or send cards or have any contact until visitation time. It's really sad. I'm not trying to bash the system either, I know a lot of people that work for CPS and the courts and they work very hard to keep kids in safe and loving environments, but they have to operate under the constructs they are provided with!! I know that there are cases where those guidelines work for the best too.
The good thing is we have so much information about her and none of it good. Even the "consultation" lawyer (before we had the info) says he doubts she can pull it off. But it will affect the kids who at this point are straight A students and active in all the school "stuff". I would hate to see that change. The trouble maker could end up back in jail because we are not going to hold back. She has destroyed any chance of being part of this family because she has burned all bridges. She actually sent a text asking to have the kids for the weekend while the kids former shrink was here getting on board. The shrink advised us not to allow the visit until after we have seen the judge and made visits "supervised" only. She has already screwed herself. On top of that the kids do not want to live with her.
Comments
The good thing is we have so much information about her and none of it good. Even the "consultation" lawyer (before we had the info) says he doubts she can pull it off. But it will affect the kids who at this point are straight A students and active in all the school "stuff". I would hate to see that change. The trouble maker could end up back in jail because we are not going to hold back. She has destroyed any chance of being part of this family because she has burned all bridges. She actually sent a text asking to have the kids for the weekend while the kids former shrink was here getting on board. The shrink advised us not to allow the visit until after we have seen the judge and made visits "supervised" only. She has already screwed herself. On top of that the kids do not want to live with her.